1. 10 Basic Marriage Truths Every Christian Spouse Should Know

    February 13, 2016 by Paul Chappell


    My wife Terrie and I were blessed to celebrate our thirty-fifth wedding anniversary last December. Every day—and more—I thank the Lord for Terrie and the gift of being her husband. Proverbs 18:22 is absolutely fulfilled in my life through her: “Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the Lord.”

    A marriage that endures through the decades is the result of God’s grace through two people who are committed to one another. Sometimes as I counsel couples, I’m reminded of how important it is when it comes to marriage to keep the basics in mind. If we forget the basic truths about biblical marriage, we easily make assumptions that, over time, undermine the marriage relationship.

    Here are ten basics—in no particular order—that every married Christian should remember: (more…)

  2. 15 Real Ways to Honor Your Wife

    February 13, 2015 by Paul Chappell


    I’ve read 1 Peter 3:7 hundreds—if not thousands—of times.

    Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.—1 Peter 3:7

    This verse is rich with marital counsel to husbands, and I use it often in counseling.

    • Dwell with them according to knowledge: Really know what her needs are as well as her likes, dislikes, and preferences.
    • As unto the weaker vessel: Remember she has special needs, and be sensitive to them.
    • As being heirs together of the grace of life: Treat your wife as an equal—as heirs together of God’s grace.
    • That your prayers be not hindered: If a husband is not being sensitive to his wife, he is limiting his access to answered prayer.

    But while I was meditating on this verse several months ago, a phrase that I had not given much thought to hit me like a lead pipe:

    Giving honour unto the wife…

    That’s contrary to how men think. We think it is our wives who are to give us honor. But in that moment, the Holy Spirit said to me, “You don’t honor Terrie as much as you could.” (more…)

  3. Growth Points 50: How to Nurture a Godly Family in a Fervent Ministry Environment

    May 6, 2014 by Paul Chappell

    All of us that are passionate about ministry recognize that we often have competing interests between family and ministry. If we’re not careful, we can yield to the addiction of the urgency in ministry to the neglect of our families.

    I know that at times I was on the wrong end of that equation as I raised our children. I’m thankful for the Holy Spirit, the Word of God, and a godly wife who reminded me over the years to keep that balance. By God’s grace, and I believe Terrie’s sensitivity to this need for balance, we’re thankful today to have four married children happily serving the Lord in ministry.

    I’d like to share a few thoughts on how you can nurture a spiritual family while being involved in a busy ministry environment:

    (If you cannot see this video in your RSS reader or email, you can watch it here.)

    Make sure you get all future Growth Points videos by subscribing to the Spiritual Leadership Podcast.

  4. The Best Marriage Book I’ve Read This Year

    February 14, 2014 by Paul Chappell


    When Terrie and I got married thirty-three years ago, one of the commitments we made was to keep growing as husband and wife. Every year, I read at least one book on marriage (usually more), and Terrie does the same. Often we read the same book and then discuss it together.

    The most recent book I read, however, was just for me—The Exemplary Husband by Stuart Scott. Without a doubt, it is one of the best books I’ve ever read on marriage.

    The topics covered in this book get right to the heart issues of marriage (although the first three chapters are pretty basic and a little slow). The author uses much Scripture throughout the book, and he provides lists with practical, bullet point applications—just what we men need.

    For instance, here are his main thoughts with bulleted lists on “Ways a Husband Can Treat His Wife as His Companion”: (more…)

  5. 14 Reasons I Love Terrie

    February 14, 2013 by Paul Chappell


    1. Her Love for the Lord—My wife did not come from a Christian home, but she established her own consistent walk with God after being saved through a bus ministry in Northern California.
    2. Her love for me—We’ve been married for over thirty-two years, and I’ve not yet seen the end of the many ways she shows her sacrificial love for me.
    3. Her love and care for our children—Terrie is the best at creating memories, teaching biblical principles, and helping me to be a balanced father and grandfather.
    4. Her love for our grandchildren—She has a passion to see them know Christ.
    5. Her love for our extended family—Terrie has always been a mercy shower and a peacemaker.
    6. Her love for our local church—The epitome of a faithful church member, Terrie is always present, continually reaching out to encourage and comfort others, and labors in soulwinning and ministry.
    7. Her love for hospitality – Terrie loves to cook and serve God’s people. She’s even forgiven me for the times I sprang unexpected company on her.
    8. Her love for children—Terrie teaches the fourth grade girls’ Sunday school class, and she loves her students dearly. She prays for them, spends hours weekly preparing lessons and activities, and invests herself to encourage their faith and walk with God.
    9. Her love for teaching—Terrie teaches a class each semester at West Coast Baptist College. This semester is the Methods and Materials class for teaching. She loves preparing the next generation of Christian servants.
    10. Her love for making memories—From family Easter egg hunts to grand birthday parties to dinner on the “Special Plate,” Terrie has always made home life special.
    11. Her love for Christ in difficult times—At the side of a child’s hospital bed or when ministry was hurting us in some way, Terrie has never been bitter or divisive.
    12. Her love for the simple things—Terrie has never been materialistic. She is as content with a night at home as she is with any nice hotel or getaway.
    13. Her love and appreciation for genuine Christian living—Terrie has never been a pompous, loud, or proud person. She does not glory in her standards or Christian growth; she glories in her Lord.
    14. Her love for me—I know I said this once, but when I consider her love and patience with a type-A personality, pastor/husband, I am truly humbled, honored, and blessed.

    I love you, Terrie! I know I don’t deserve you, and I’m so blessed to have you. Happy Valentine’s Day.